In our house, when someone says something thatâ€™s clearly not true, we call them a â€œbig fat liar pants.â€ Now, this is not to make light of telling lies; lying (and omitting the truth) receives harsh punishment, just ask the Girl, whoâ€™s currently grounded from all electronics. But, sometimes, there are things said even though thereâ€™s no possible way it could be the truth, and the speaker doesnâ€™t even expect the listener to believe him or her. For example, â€œI donâ€™t know why you tripped over my shoes since I put them in my closet where they belong,â€ said the big fat liar pants.
Last weekend, we watched two movies, one of which has really stuck with me this week. I donâ€™t want to talk about We Need to Talk About Kevin. I try not to think too much about that one. The one that I canâ€™t seem to stop thinking about is The Words. Bryan said his mom watched it and â€œknew Iâ€™d like it.â€ I did like it. But it made me teary. When Bryan asked why, I couldnâ€™t put it into words. Because Iâ€™m a big fat liar pants.
The Words is about a writer who, in the midst of the tidal wave of rejection from potential publishers of his first novel, finds an old manuscript in an attachÃ© his wife purchased for him at an antique store. When he reads this manuscript (these words of another), heâ€™s overcome with emotion â€¦ the story so genuine, the descriptions so detailed, the feelings so raw â€¦ heâ€™s moved, heâ€™s awed â€¦ and heâ€™s jealous. He has no idea who wrote these words or how they ended up hidden away from the world; all he knows is that he wishes heâ€™d written them.
At this point in the movie, the writer tells his wife, â€œIâ€™m not who I thought I was, okay? Iâ€™m not. And Iâ€™m terrified that I never will be.â€ (The Words, 2012). I get this. His wife gets upset, taking his comments to mean heâ€™s not happy with her. Of course, he loves her, but, just as we learn about that manuscriptâ€™s original writer, he â€œloved the words more than the woman [he] was writing them for.â€ (The Words, 2012).
Now the blurb for the movie will tell you what happens next: the writer passes the words off as his own, receiving both critical and commercial success. And then he meets the original writer, the old man. The old man tells him where the words came from and all he wants in return is for the writer to bear the pain that bore the words. The old man is tired, he has nothing left, he just wants the pain to go away.
I do love words, but I donâ€™t love them more than my family. And thereâ€™ve been many times when Iâ€™ve read things I wished Iâ€™d written. Typically, I consider that a sign that I like something. But Iâ€™d never try to pass anything off as my own though. I may be a big fat liar pants but Iâ€™m not dishonest. Iâ€™m a big fat liar pants because Iâ€™m not who I thought I was. Writers put words on paper; they share things with the world (however big or small that world may be to them). If I had to put a number on it, Iâ€™d say about 95% of my â€œwritingâ€ occurs in my head. Only about 5% of my words make it to paper. I spend too much time in my own head (but, hey, I know everyone there and itâ€™s cozy). Iâ€™ve got at least three â€œwritingâ€ projects in the works; the majority of which are in my head. How can I call myself a writer if I never finish anything longer than a blog post (and this oneâ€™s been in my head for four days now!)?
Iâ€™m not a writer. Iâ€™m a thinker. Nothing more than a daydreamer. Â Donâ€™t get me wrong, daydreaming is fun, but Iâ€™m not who I thought I was. â€œAt some point, you have to choose between life and fiction. The two are very close, but they never actually touch.â€ (The Words, 2012). Iâ€™m a big fat liar pants.
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Stephanie, you are a thinker AND a writer. This was compelling and honest and I loved it.
So glad you liked it! Thanks for stopping by and commenting!
I so get this, the loving of words and the not being who I thought I was. I never saw this movie, but you made me think I need to. I’d never put my writing above my family, but I understand its importance in my world. Maybe all writers are big fat liar pants. I’m so glad you put this link in TW. Thanks for sharing!
It’s a good movie, particularly for those of us who love words. Thank you for understanding (and commenting, too)!
Kindred? I think you’re right. I can SO relate to this. But I think that’s fear talking, and I’m also reminding myself that it’s not always fear, sometimes it’s laziness on my part. That sounds harsh, but when the words sound so good in my head and I have to struggle through getting them onto paper, sometimes I’d rather not do the work. I was struck this week by a line in Jon Acuff’s new book (Start): “”Time is the only honest indication of what really matters to us. Intentions are ambitious liars.” I don’t want to just have good intentions about writing. I want to do the work, even if it’s hard.
Keep thinking and keep living, Stephanie, and let those thoughts, let life, spill into your writing. It doesn’t have to be perfect; it just needs to be YOU.
ps…I am definitely going to check out that movie! 🙂
Erika, love the quote. So appropriate. And, harsh or not, laziness does come into play … sometimes I’ve no excuse other than I decided to watch TV or play a silly game … I want to do the work … I need to do the work … so I should just shut up and do it! 🙂
Thanks for stopping by and commenting. Great to connect with you. Let me know what you think of the movie.
[…] week I called myself for being a Big Fat Liar Pants, whining that I canâ€™t seem to finish anything longer than a blog post. I talked about my various […]
I liked this since I can relate. It was a good piece. Don’t quit.
Thank you Mary.