I may be the fun parent but I’m a terrible wife. Earlier this summer, I posted (and did a little jig) about my kids saying I was the fun parent. While shocked to learn they view me as such, I’ve come to accept the title.
On Monday when hubs came home from work, the Girl giddily asked, “Who’s the happiest girl in the world?!”
“Who?” he asked, playing along.
“Meeeee!” She beamed and then proceeded to tell him how I’d gotten tickets to take her and her friends to the premiere of This Is Us (that’s the One Direction concert movie for those of you without tween-age daughters).
“What?!” he asked incredulously, looking at me.
Shrugging, I said, “I’m the fun parent,” as if that answered everything clearly. I’d like to end the story there … you know, on a high note … but …
Yesterday, hubs turned the big 4-0. A few months ago, I asked him what he wanted for his upcoming big day. I remember saying something like, “It’s a big birthday, you should get something big.” (Why, oh why, would I say that? Oh, yeah, ’cause I turn 40 next year). He said he wanted a new gun. Okay, he was actually very specific: an AR-15 … x y z … yada yada yada … heck if I remember now what it was. I’ll tell you what I do remember: that particular type of gun costs about $1200. So, um, yeah, I didn’t get him that.
Instead, I got him a not-cheap-in-its-own-right-but-not-$1200 new Keurig coffee maker. It arrived on a Saturday, when he was home, so there was no hiding it and saving it for a big surprise on his big day. So he’s been using his birthday gift daily for a few weeks now.
Anyway, he walked in from work yesterday with the remains of what appeared to be a rather large birthday cake. As the kids dug into the left over cake, even though it was already past their bedtime and certainly past a reasonable hour for sugar on a school night, I said, “Oh wow! They threw you a party? Did you expect that?” He said he had no idea about it until right before and that when he was handing out thanks one of his co-workers said, “Ah, this was nothing. Bet your wife has something big planned. I mean, it’s your 40th.”
I got nothing.
Who’s got two thumbs and is a terrible wife? Yeah, this girl.
As we were getting ready for bed, I came clean: “Uh, just so you know, I don’t have anything planned.” He laughed it off and said it was okay, that he didn’t need anything else. I think he really meant it but still …
Even right now, I’ve no clue what I’d even do for him. We’ve been together almost 20 years, you’d think I’d have some idea what he’d want, and yet I’m coming up empty. I mean, he’s not very social, doesn’t really like parties. He’d rather watch a movie at home in his underwear than go out any day of the week. So what could I really do?
Hmm, or maybe I’m just imposing all this on him because I really don’t want to have to plan anything else. See: a. terrible. wife.